"First, we will stop feeling sorry for ourselves, it's not very attractive. Second, we will try to enjoy each other's company here in this beautiful place. Third, we will make our plans for the future. Can we agree to that?"
-The Darjeeling Limited
The back to school stuff is on the shelves at Staples, and August has set in. Now, I almost never make New Year's resolutions, because, as previously stated, I think January is a terrible time time to resolve anything. January is cold. January is long. January when you lie in bed and eat pie. That is what it exists for. That said, I nearly always make resolutions in the fall. Fall is spunky. Fall smells like Dixon Ticonderogas. Fall is when you buy lots of bins from Ikea, and some new clothes that make you look like a grownup, and a Very Serious Book that you are absolutely going to read. Fall is when you pull your shit together and decide that this is going to be your year. And August is when it all starts. We are going to get it together. Ready?
Because, sure, summer's great. Summer means keggers, drunk swimming, totally inappropriate boys, sleeping off hangovers on the beach, smoking weed in people's backyards and screwing around at dreadful summer jobs. Last summer, I worked in a building actually shaped like a hot dog. (this summer was tamer thanks to monogamy and a job that requires that I not be too hungover to stand up.) It was a pretty dreadful job, but on a positive note, I will never eat a hot dog again. I also learned every dick joke ever.
August is time to shake the glitter off your clothes, if I may borrow a phrase from Katy Perry. (Although last summer's "Waking Up in Keene" remix is better and more regret-filled.) It's time to detox a little bit, and make some plans. Make a list. Make a resolution. Make a five-year plan. Hell, make a five-hour plan. I don't mean to get touchy-feely on you, but I believe there's a power in making plans. Writing things down makes them more real; speaking them aloud even more so. Even if you never do something, you increase your chances of doing it just by putting it out there. (You shouldn't tell that good, wise friend of yours about your plans though. Or tell him/her but also tell that asshole friend who will make fun of you for the rest of your life if you don't follow through. This gets results.) Write down your plans, and then cross things off as you accomplish them. You can make a bucket list if you want, but personally I like to start small. Write down some things you've already done and then cross those off. Feels good doesn't it? That ballpoint Bic just slashing through those tasks. You're a machine. You bought stamps AND got your hair cut. Now, move on to the rest. We've got a big year ahead of us.
...what? Try to find a motivational indie song. Just TRY.